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akasha5 akasha5
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8 years ago
I am required to follow the 6 Cs of Communication to revise these sentences to make them more adequate.   Any help would be appreciated.

1.   Effective immediately, April 1, the anniversary of the birth of our founder, will be declared a company holiday.

I am debating if declared is passive and the right way to word this sentence.  Here is what I have come up with.

Effective immediately, April 1, the birthday of our found will be declared as a company holiday.

2.  There is available a brochure in the personnel office, which gives a listing of all the tours that are offered.

Brochures are available in the personnel office, which give a listing of all the tours that are offered.


Any suggestions would be appreciated to make my sentences grammatically correct and concise.  Thank You
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