During a group therapy session, a newly admitted patient suddenly says to the nurse, How old are ...

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A question such as this is common in the initial phase of group development when the members are getting to know one another, dealing with trust issues, and testing the leader. Making explicit the implied serves to role-model more effective communication and prompts further discussion of the patient's concern. Asking the patient to tell the leader more about the question focuses on the reason for the member's concern rather than on the issue raised (the experience and ability of the leader) and is a less helpful response. I am old enough to be a nurse and age is not pertinent are somewhat defensive responses and are not therapeutic because neither addresses the patient's valid concern.